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  • Sun, 27, Aug, 2017 - 5:00:AM

The Ten Commandments if God were a woman

1

Thou shall worship whichever God most appeals to thee. Thou shall not go to war over worshipping different Gods. Thou shall live and let live.

2

Thou shall not make idols. Because that’s objectifying. Don’t do it.

3

Thou shall not take God’s name in vain. Thou shall also not say bitch, slut, whore or anything else that’s misogynist, sexist, racist, homophobic or xenophobic.

4

Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. And remember to put the toilet seat down, also to keep things holy.

5

Honour thy mother and father. Especially thy mother. Dost thou have any idea the things she went through to give birth to thee, and puts up with every day?

6

Thou shall not murder. Thou shall also not threaten to murder someone IRL or online. Ditto rape threats.

7

Thou shall not commit rape or any form of sexual harassment. That includes touching, insulting language, anything. Instead, thou shall have safe, respectful, consensual relationships. Women and men are equal.

8

Thou shall respect other people’s boundaries and property. Got it? Ask for permission first.

9

Thou shall learn to share nicely. Or thine ever-loving God shall come down there and put thee all in time out. Thou have been warned.

10

Thou shall not covet. Thou are perfect. Thy God made thee in Her image. Duh.

TAGGED IN

  • Women /
  • Women's Rights /
  • God /
  • Religion /
  • Ten Commandments /
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